The Shadow and the Shimmer

I want to preface this by saying that almost all of this post came to me in a daydreamy/sleepy state while lying in bed last night (early this morning?). Have to start writing down these thoughts when I wake up...some of them are pretty interesting!!! What You Tune Into Matters. This can, of course, be applied to almost any area of life. What we CONSUME, creates our reality. Television, music, movies, food, beliefs, friends...it all adds up and adds to our vision of reality. I was thinking particularly about my relationship with the news, and how a shift in viewing habits made a really big difference in my overall happiness. When I first moved to Switzerland, we didn't have many English channels. In fact, the "news" was pretty much the only thing I could tap into in English. Now, we have better Anglo channels, and I do watch quite a bit of French TV, but I digress. Back in the day (aka, Fall 2016-fairly recently? Spring 2017?) I pretty much had the n...

So, I realize that I blog a lot about my current realities; the blessings and bliss and perks of being a sober mom. I focus on all of that good stuff because, in a way, it's new to me. I'm not used to being permanently non-anxious. I'm not used to feeling good so regularly. A lot of people in early recovery talk about these early moments; when you begin to feel authentically, when you learn how to speak your truth without "liquid courage", when what people think of you stops being priority. But, it's helpful as well to remember exactly why I decided to cut alcohol out of my life. I wouldn't say that I was the type of drinker who got drunk and fucked everything up. I never lost a job due to drinking, I had a nice apartment, I had (still have!) a dog that I took care of. I really loved my friends and family and didn't actively push anyone away (although now, I have a different view on how my drinking was damaging to some important relationships, in i...

I realize I haven't updated my blog in quite some time! I fall into these spells where I get a little too pre-occupied with my "work" writing, and forget that investing in my creative writing is just as important! I'm hoping to revamp my website in January and re-launch my site with a new concept (now/old concept. It's pretty clear that this is going in the direction of a sober living/recovery blog, cause that's what I'm passionate about these days!). BUT, in the meantime- here are some point-form updates for ya! ⇢We are having another baby boy!!! I am so excited. It's funny how when I first got pregnant (with Theo) I had this idea that I would have a little girl. I dreamt about raising her to be strong and independent and to take no shit from anyone. I swore that she would not struggle through the feelings of low self-worth that plagued me for a big part of my life. But then, we found out it was a boy. After mom'ing a little guy for 8 month...